|BE Kind Ó2012 Currie Silver|
Just BE Kind
There’s nothing like Kindness
For mending what is broken
I’m someone who imagines she is kind yet who knows how hard it is to even muster a good thought for someone, especially someone I associate reflexively with an old and deep hurt, humiliation, or devastation to ME.
BEing Kind when I have been hurt, humiliated, and/or devastated takes far more than I BElieve I could EVER have to DO this. I’m far from that strong. In fact, it is something of a trademark of mine. Somehow I learned early and deep to hold onto pain and unkindness and let it act as a buffer to further hurt, humiliation, and/or devastation.
The insanity of such a notion always seems to live on the sidelines, laughing, jeering, and blowing raspberries in my general direction. I don’t know that I learned this so well earlier on, but I DO know I have it down pat Now.
Lately I have been aware of something in me falling away. Like Gracie shedding, it all feels so normal, ordinary, even natural. But there is something still holding me back, and I think it is there more for protection or preservation. I don’t know, YET, who or what will eventually win me over…
I love you, Currie