Monday, October 15, 2012

Currie's Gratitude 15 October 2012

It is often hard to BElieve.
When I see my reflection
Looking at me in the mirror
Or discover something I wrote
Just yesterday, mayBE last week
When I wasn’t really “there” writing it…
Seeing the woman I live inside of
The She who is ME.

I am NOT all that existential, really, but I suppose this is what comes of capturing my thoughts as they free fall like drops of rain in a storm. Waking early and writing first thing, BEfore thinking or listening or BEing influenced in some way. Like sifting through dreams. Their weird settings and impossibilities plain as the blue sky.

I am grateful I have made it a habit, to catch these things and put them down, so to speak, on “paper.” It is sort of like BEing a solar light for the stuff that wanders in and out of me. When the light is lessened outside, what is inside of me lights up. Brightly.

Amazing, really. And yet how can “amazing” feel so normal?! This is something I might never find an answer to. And that is fine. I have grown up. I have BEcome someone who needs far less than she ever imagined. Who prefers enough and embraces discipline like Gracie does belly rubs.

I am so grateful just to BE.

I love you, Currie

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