To stay with that shakiness—to stay with a broken heart, with a rumbling stomach, with the feeling of hopelessness and wanting to get revenge—that is the path of true awakening. Sticking with that uncertainty, getting the knack of relaxing in the midst of chaos, learning not to panic—this is the spiritual path. [Pema Chödrön, Stay with Your Broken Heart]
I’ve always tried to still shakiness, somehow. It is only Now that I am really game to let it BE. To NOT feel like I need to DO something or CHANGE something. The shakiness is like the colour of my hair. It is evolving of its own accord.
Now I am more inclined to stay in. To remain Present. To observe, listen, and then, easily, almost without thinking, Let Go.
I’m thinking about some new ways and ideas are dancing somewhat haphazardly, but dancing all the same inside my little birdbrain. Then I realise that what I call thinking about is really just taking in the perspectives opening to me.
Someone asked me something Thursday which felt strange. Nothing more. I realise Now that what she asked of me she considers essential for herself, and everyone else, too. But I can forgive that. Easily. We all seek comfort BEfore we come to stay with our shakinesses.
I love you, Currie