Monday, August 25, 2014

Currie's Gratitude 25 August 2014

In the world of the dreamer there was solitude: all the exaltations and joys came in the moment of preparation for living. They took place in solitude. But with action came anxiety, and the sense of insuperable effort made to match the dream, and with it came weariness, discouragement, and the flight into solitude again. And then in solitude, in the opium den of remembrance, the possibility of pleasure again.  [Ana├»s Nin]

I suppose this is a little too deep for a Monday morning. I love Solitude yet I am having so much of it lately without really appreciating it. Both companionship and shared time BEcome unnerving. I canNOT explain myself better.

I feel awkward and tentative. Out of sorts. Like I have left something undone and canNOT figure out what that is.

Sometimes getting active is all that is necessary. Others, the ability to sit still and NOT draw conclusions or BElieve all that my brain is telling me.

Whatever happened to just following the bouncing ball?! Playing for the sheer JOY of the play itself?!

You can't depend on your eyes when your imagination is out of focus.  [Mark Twain]

This is it!!! I am trying to use an out of focus imagination to overcome something I canNOT really SEE. It’s time to just let go.

I love you, Currie


Carol said...

Letting go is one of the hardest things to do.... all our lives we are trained to hold on and persevere. When in reality letting go is usually what's best for us . Sending love as you float through all of this.

Rita said...

Yes, when you are really feeling awful and aren't capable of doing much of anything but what's absolutely necessary (and that can be a struggle) have to just let go. When I am in too much pain to focus enough to read I try to get lost in a movie or TV...or some beautiful music that's gentle on my soul. Sometimes you have to just let go and get through the day. My days are not as bad as yours, I'm sure, but that's what works for me. Hang in there. *hugs*