So much of the past in encapsulated in the odds and ends. Most of us discard more information about ourselves than we ever care to preserve. Our recollection of the past is not simply distorted by our faulty perception of events remembered but skewed by those forgotten. The memory is like twin orbiting stars, one visible, one dark, the trajectory of what's evident forever affected by the gravity of what's concealed. [Sue Grafton, O is for Outlaw]
Even if I try really hard, there’s a LOT of what I once knew that escapes me Now. That is inconvenient in myriad ways. At least until I realise that memory, information, and even simple statistics are no more Present Tense than what I see and feel and hear and touch and taste.
This stretch is harder than ever to navigate. I feel how distinctly my part is NOT to attempt control. How in this I must BE submissive in a way I never understood until Now. Sometimes I just canNOT help myself. I want to get in and fiddle with things, like if I just DO this or that one thing, everything will change.
I may have people lying to me, but since I don't really know the truth, I can't be sure. [Sue Grafton, C is for Corpse]
I love you, Currie